Napoleon got married
by iluvskaters
Summary: Napoleon got married to Debb and are haveing marriage problems!
1. Guess who got married

The story starts out in 2015 Napoleon and Debb got married.

* * *

Napoleon- Debb come make me some tots

Debb- I got to go to my job Napoleon so you have to make them your self

Napoleon- you need a better job, that one flippin sucks! Gosh

Debb- I wanted to go to collage but you told me to that collage sucks

Napoleon- your mom goes to collage

Debb- good bye napoleon

Napoleon- bye Debb

Debb leaves and napoleon is all alone

Napoleon- I feel like a firkin slave I got to do everything around here!

opens the freezer and grabs some tots. The freezer is packed with just tots he puts the tots in the oven and turns it on. He picks up the phone and calls pedro

Pedro- hello

Napoleon- yea is pedro there?

Pedro- yes this is pedro.

Napoleon- Hi me and debb just had a flippin huge fight!

Pedro- about what?

Napoleon- collage

Pedro- oh

Napoleon- Yeah like im super upset right now so come over and like we will eat tots.

Pedro- free tots ok ill be right over

Napoleon- ok bye

Pedro- bye

So this is the first chapter what do you think please tell me so i can fix it this is my first story of all time so review and tell me the truth Gosh!


	2. They try to fix it!

I want to say thanks to the reviews that helped me make this chapter better then the other ( I hope)

Pedro- I think you should make her a cake!

Napoleon- Ok

Pedro- And you should apologize!

Napoleon- No are you freakin nuts I cant apologize then that means I did something wrong and I didn't!

Pedro- I still think you should!

Napoleon- ill think about it! And I think she wants me to get a job!

Pedro- you should work with me at taco bell

Napoleon- that would be flippin awesome!

Pedro- ok. Well I got to go home thanks for the tots.

Napoleon- Bye. Tell your mom I said hi!

Pedro- ok bye.

Pedro leaves and napoleon goes to the kitchen and gets out the cake mix

Napoleon- Now how do you flippin make a cake?

Debb walks in to see a cake on the kitchen table that says "Im sorry Debb" on it.

Debb- Napoleon im home!

Napoleon- I made you a cake

Debb- why

Napoleon- to say im sorry gosh!

Debb- that's sweet but I think…

Napoleon- (cutting her off) and im getting a JOB!

Debb- that's great but…

Napoleon- (cutting her off again) im going to work with Pedro at taco bell!

Debb- I think we should see a marriage counselor.

Napoleon- No they cost to much we cant afford it and they are freakin NUTS!

Debb- we either talk to one or we get a divorce

Napoleon- ok but we cant afford it!

Debb- we get a discount if we go see your uncle!

Napoleon- Rico is nuts he only dose that so he can meet women Gosh

Debb- then we get divorced.

Napoleon- fine ill call him!

Debb- Ok. Thanks for the cake honey!

Napoleon- you welcome.

Napoleon walks over to the phone and calls his uncle

Rico- Marriage counseling Ill make sure you have a man at the end of a session!

Napoleon- Rico Its Napoleon

Rico- what do you want?

Napoleon- Debb wants us to see a marriage counselor!

Rico- you mean me.

Napoleon- what are you a freakin idiot?

Rico- Now napoleon you need me!

Napoleon- fine gosh.

Rico- you can come in on ummm... hold on let me check my secudal. ( shuffles around papers but his secudle book is completely empty) ok I can fit you in tomorrow at 3:15

Napoleon- ok that's fine

Rico- ok ill see you at 3:15 tomrrow. Bye

Napoleon- bye

Please review! i need to know any quetsions or coments you have!


	3. They have a baby

I hope I kept you wanting to read more that was the point!

Rico- so now Debb what dose Napoleon do that gets you mad?

Debb- He doesn't get me mad he just starts an argument

Rico- Just as I thought, napoleon will you please leave the room

Napoleon- NO! Gosh

Debb- its okay napoleon go

Napoleon- fine but don't touch Debb

Rico-just go napoleon

Napoleon- fine!

Napoleon leaves and Rico stands up and walks behind Debb and puts his hands on her schoulder's

Rico- do you want my opinon on this subject?

Debb- yes

Rico- I suggest you get divorced and move on to maybe an older man, a wiser man, a handsome man, (walks around between her and the desk), someone like… me!

Debb- NO I love my husband and I just realized we may have a few fights now and then but I am lucky he isn't like you! You are scum!

Debb stomps out of the room and slams the door behind her

Debb- come-on napoleon we are going home!

Napoleon- okay

They return to the house

Debb- napoleon will you go to the store I think we are low on tots

Napoleon- no we aren't we have 34 bags left

Debb- I want to have 35

Napoleon- okay where are the keys

Debb- On the counter

Napoleon goes to the store and comes back

Napoleon- I got the tots!

Debb- im in the bed room

Napoleon- well come here

Debb- no Napoleon come into the bedroom

Napoleon- fine

Napoleon walks into the bedroom

Debb- sit on the bed

Napoleon- where are you

Debb- in the bath room just sit on the bed

Napoleon- fine gosh

Debb walks out of the bathroom in her new lingerie

Napoleon- WOW

Debb- I just need to know before we do this do you want to have a baby?

Napoleon- Do what?

Debb- you know… make…have…umm…(in a whisper) sex

Napoleon- this is freakin awesome (starts to unzip his pants)

Debb- wait, do you want to have a baby?

Napoleon- (not paying attention) yea whatever

Debb- ok

Blacks out and says 10 years and 9 months later

Debb- Happy Birthday to you happy Birthday to you happy birth day dear Mildred Happy birthday to you!

Napoleon- You smell like a monkey and you look like one to!

Mildred- dad your being so mean to me, gosh (Mildred looks just like debb but acts just like napoleon!)

Napoleon- no im not gosh!

Mildred- yes you are gosh!

Napoleon- no im not gosh!

Mildred- yes you are gosh!

Napoleon- no im not gosh!

Mildred- yes you are gosh!

Debb- Stop it, napoleon be nice its her birthday and Mildred respect you father!

Mildred- you both are freakin idiots!

Debb- ok just eat your cake!

Mildred- I want to open my present's first

Debb- you already blew out the candle on your cake! Now you have to eat it!

Mildred- Fine! Gosh. This is freakin chocolate cake I only like yellow cake! Freakin idiot!

Debb- sorry ill get you a new one tomorrow! Now you can open your presents!

Mildred- This one is from dad. (it's a tiny little box. She opens it) yes more chap stick!

Napoleon- if you don't want it Ill take it

Mildred- no I want it my lip are so freakin chapped right now!

This is all I have right now! I wanted to update but I didn't have a lot of time so I threw this together I hope you like it. I had to change the rating though, but please review!


	4. Mildred Goes to high school

This takes place a little over 4 years later its Mildred's first day of high school!

Teacher- Hello girls and boys I would like to start off and go over our classroom rules! Number one (her voice starts to fade out)

Susan- hey dweb are you taking this down? I want a copy

Mildred- no im drawing gosh

Susan- well stop and write this down

Mildred- NO! Gosh im drawing a zat! It's the cross between a bat and a zebra and they will rule the world and kill every one but me and Tina!

Susan- what ever dweb! Just write the notes down for me!

Mildred- NO!

Teacher- do you have something to say Mildred?

Mildred- yea you all are freakin idiots!

Now Mildred is in the principal's office!

Principal- now Mildred you seem like a nice girl so if you go apologize to Ms. Hillman and her class I wont call your dad!

Mildred- No gosh

Principal- fine (picks up the phone and dials a number) Hello is Napoleon there... Hello this is the principal of John Edwards School… yes I would like to ask you to come in… this regards your daughter… ok thank you (hangs up the phone) now your dads on the way!

Mildred- why can't you call my mom? Freakin idiot!

Napoleon walks in

Napoleon- Hi

Mildred- hi daddy

Napoleon- stop acting like your mom gosh

Mildred- fine gosh

Napoleon- now what did you do?

Mildred- nothing did you at least bring my chap stick!

Napoleon- yea here

Principal- she called me, her teacher and the rest of the class a freakin idiot

Napoleon- and…

Principal- she called us a freakin idiot

Napoleon- so I called my teachers that!

Mildred- see

Napoleon- Mildred let me handle this Gosh

Mildred- fine Gosh

Principal- so do you want to take her home or let her go back to class

Mildred- I want to go home gosh

Napoleon- no your mom took off today we are celebrating our anniversary!

Mildred- so ill stay in my room

Napoleon- No we are doing adult stuff

Mildred- gross gosh fine ill stay here!

Principal- now Mildred you can go back to class but napoleon wait (Mildred left the room)

Napoleon- what do you want?

Principal- don't think I forgot how you use to be in high school if your daughter is anything like you, you will want to put her in a different school

Napoleon- she'll do just fine! Gosh

I just wanted to let you know it wasn't the end well please review I still have lots more to come!


	5. Hanky Panky

Napoleon gets home and shuts the door behind him

Napoleon- debb im home

Deb- im in the bedroom

Napoleon- did you move

Debb- I was starting to get a cramp

Napoleon walks in to the bedroom

Napoleon- so I would have gotten you some Advil! Gosh!

Deb- sorry I can do it again

Napoleon- no the moments over gosh!

Deb- ok well come over here

Napoleon- hold on I have to take my pants off gosh!

Deb- ok just hurry

Napoleon- I can only go so fast

Deb- ok well what happened with Mildred

Napoleon- don't talk about her ill get out of the mood cant you wait 5 minutes

Debb- (she mumbles) you mean like an hour

Napoleon- what did you say

Debb- ummm… after this I got to take a shower

Napoleon- ok here I come

Napoleon walks out in Scooby Doo boxers

Debb- oh I forgot I got you something for you

Napoleon- yes! chap stick (starts to jump up and down and clapping his hands)

Debb- no not chap stick (she pulls something out of a bag)

Napoleon- I don't like sling shots they hurt gosh

Debb- it's not a sling shot I went to Victoria's secret today and the lady handed me a coupon for a victor's secret and I went by and I saw this and I thought it would look great on you

Napoleon- no way its way to small gosh

Debb- well then no hanky panky for you mister

Napoleon- fine its going to be like putting two bowling balls into a zip lock not going to work

Debb- (she mumbles) or like putting two tots in a garbage bag!

Napoleon- huh?

Debb- nothing

Napoleon walks out with a towel around his waist

Debb- well I don't get to see it

Napoleon- no

Debb- you'll only have to where it for two seconds if it all works out like plan!

He hops into bed covers up then throws the towel

Debb- come on napoleon (she reaches under the blankets and rips it off) see

She hops into bed with him then the screen fades out to her sitting up in bed

Debb- time… better then the last time

Napoleon- what was the time

Debb- twenty three minutes and seventeen seconds

Napoleon- record time wanna give it one more try

Debb- no I want to know what happened with Mildred

Napoleon- called her teacher an idiot now we got an hour till she gets home so we have plenty of time!

Debb- no I need to take a shower I don't want Mildred to know

Napoleon- she won't know!

Debb- fine well I got another thing at victor's secret it's a book

Napoleon- what about how to make fun of napoleon in front of his wife!

Debb- 103 sex positions

Napoleon- ewww

Debb- I want to try something new there's this one that looks easy it's on page 41

Napoleon- pop here's the beaver

Debb-no it's the one next to it… dog fight

Napoleon- but you need one more guy

Debb- I know I was thinking kip

Napoleon- ewwww no pick some one else

Debb- rico

Napoleon- if they aren't related to me ill do it

Debb- promise

Napoleon- I won't eat tots for a month if I say no

Debb- Pedro

Napoleon- ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Debb- you promised

Napoleon- fine gosh

Debb- ok go call him

Napoleon- no ill just ask him at work tomorrow we are doing the drive through together

Debb- ok

Next day at taco bell

Pedro- so napoleon what's new?

Napoleon- NOTHING GOSH

Pedro- ok well we should get to work

Napoleon- wait I need to ask you something

Pedro- ok what

Napoleon- umm… Debb bought this book… its called 103 sex positions

Pedro- ohhh how is she did you try one on page 23

Napoleon- no she is making me do this one on page 41

Pedro- pop here's the beaver

Napoleon- no the one next to it

Pedro- oh dog fight umm who is the other guy then?

Napoleon- umm… she wanted… made me… umm… you!

Pedro- what? Did she want me or did you?

Napoleon- she did! I don't want to do it

Pedro- I should make her a cake

Napoleon- so you want to do it

Pedro- sure I need to show her the one on page 23 you will like it!

Napoleon- ok

Pedro- when

Napoleon- tonight

Pedro- ok let me go ask my mom

Napoleon- ok

5 minutes later

Pedro- mom said I could spend the night at your house tonight, I didn't tell her about the sex thing she would freak out

Napoleon- ok well lets get to work

Napoleon and Pedro walk in the door

Napoleon- im home

Debb- did Pedro say yes?

Napoleon- yea

Debb- good I got the chains come here guys

Pedro- did you get the dog collar for my part?

Debb- yes here it is do you know what to do

Pedro- yea I have the book

Debb- ok here's the chair napoleon do you know what to do

Napoleon- yea you made me study it all night

Pedro- lets start

Debb- ok start with your line napoleon

Napoleon- hey sexy master

Debb- hey spike hey duke why don't you boys come over here and give your momma kisses!

Due to the fear I have that continuing this will drive away readers but if you would like me to continue with this scene please review lol! j/k


	6. I might end this fic!

I might end this fic. In the next couple chapters so review and tell me what to do. Should I continue or should I end the fic? So consider this a contest! I will count the votes! But if I don't like the result im going to change it! Lol

Napoleon- are you happy now?

Debb- yes I was thinking of doing #78. It's called…

Napoleon- NO! You had your fun, now I don't want to do it anymore!

Debb- Fine.

Napoleon- I got to go to work now.

Debb- ok love you

Napoleon- yea me too

Taco bell

Napoleon- welcome to taco bell how may I take your order?

Pedro- hey napoleon what are you doing here so early?

Napoleon- me and Debb had a flippin huge fight!

Pedro- About what? # 78?

Napoleon- how did you know?

Pedro- Debb told me

Napoleon- flippin idiot!

Boss guy man person- napoleon phone for you.

Napoleon takes the phone and starts to walk out of taco bell with the corded phone in his hand

Napoleon-hello

Banker- hello is this napoleon dynamite?

Napoleon- heck yes

Banker- your grandma went to Vegas about two months ago and she won a little over $200,000,000 and I am sorry to say she just died and she left you and your brother kip here Vegas founds. And the rest of her money to her son Rico.

Napoleon- so when do I get the check?

Banker- actually you don't get the money till October 23 that is when the deed is being read.

Napoleon- that is like a frikin month away GOSH

Banker- im sorry but that is the soonest we can get the will.

Napoleon- Fine Gosh

Napoleon runs inside and hangs up the phone

Napoleon- Im feeling sick I have to go.

Boss guy man person- but you already used all of your sick days (but napoleon is already gone)

Napoleon runs into his house

Napoleon- Debb

Debb- yea why are you home so early?

Napoleon- we are rich

Debb- Napoleon, no we aren't you have to have the exact numbers on the ticket not the one next to

Napoleon- no I know that grandma died (and starts to jump up and down)

Debb- oh im so sorry

Napoleon- no this is good she won $200,000,000 at Vegas and left it to me and Kip

Debb- yea! Now Mildred can go to collage!

Napoleon- Your mom goes to collage. I say we go on vacation and leave Mildred with Rico.

Mildred walks in

Mildred- did I just hear my name?

Napoleon- yea me and your mom are going on vacation and you get to stay with uncle Rico.

Mildred- who that fat lard? No way am I staying there send me to uncle kips at least he has a computer all Rico has is his flippin football videos!

Debb- first of all we are putting the money in an account for Mildred when she goes to collage and second of all we don't even have the money yet

Mildred- what money?

Debb- long story ill tell you later and third of all when do we get the money napoleon?

Napoleon- October 23 gosh and Mildred doesn't need to go to collage! I never went to collage and im RICH!

Debb- but my mom isn't going to die any time soon

Mildred- grandma died (and runs into her room crying)

Debb- look what you did!

Napoleon- I wasn't the one that brought up the whole talk about _collage!_

Debb- that's not what got he upset

Napoleon- then what did _grandma dieing_ HA!

Debb- actually yes that is what got her upset!

Napoleon- oh whatever gosh

This is it for now so I need to know what I should do should I keep the story going for a while or should I end it in the next chapter. VOTE VOTE VOTE! One per screen name please if you vote twice only one vote will be counted

Thanks- ME


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